Tomorrow, the 27th.. 

That date above, it seems like a special day. Well, it was once a specal day for me, for us. It's hard to let go. I know I've made my mistakes trying to go for another woman and just forget about her. It was all a stupid move. 

I didnt want her to be unhappy, I didn't want to upset her, I didn't intend on telling her.. But I can't lie to her. I just didn't have the guts to tell her why I did it. It was for money, I was running low on cash. Parents barely gave me a cent. I had to do something, I had to work my way up. I got involved with a woman. She could give me everything I wansted; Money, car, job, stable income. It was the view of the world, I wanted those.. But I didn't want to lose the woman I love and plan to marry in the future. It all went down the drain.

No one could understand what I was going through, I love her family, I love her mom but as much as I did, they didn't understand what I was going through. I went to work just to earn some for a living with the woman. Her mom didn't like that I was working, even if I did a decent job. I can't blame her nor can I blame anyone. All I can do is blame myself.

If I didn't went with the woman to work, I wouldn't have money but atleast I would have a happy life. 

I intended to propose to you when you got back after 2 years. On the 6th year of us being together, I would kneel down. I had it all planned. It all went away. I thought you would understand me but I guess not everyone would be like me and understand these kind of situation. I could admit, I was selfish, but whatever I did.. It was for the best of us.

I just hope I never did that mistake.. If I could just rewrite it.